12/14/02:  Today would be my anniversary with Jordan if we were still together. It would have been a year and ten months. I just thought about that as I wrote the date. Anyway, what to talk about? Things with Chad and I are basically over. Everything was going so great and of course something had to mess that up. Last night Cara and I went to Stone Country and I didn’t even know Chad was going to be there, but he showed up. So I went over to him and he gave me a hug and kiss and told me how great it was to see me, yadda yadda. So then I went back over to where my friends Cara and Brooke were sitting and figured Chad would come too, but he just stayed over on the other side of the room with Nick and Ryan. So like an hour went by and I didn’t see or talk to him at all. A slow song started playing and I thought for sure he would come ask me to dance, but he didn’t. So I had no idea if he left or what. Then this guy Andy asked me to dance and it was already the second slow song and Chad apparently wasn’t going to ask me, so I said sure and danced with him. I don’t know if Chad saw us dancing or not. Then I went and talked to Cara more until she left to go dance. As I’m sitting there, I see Chad go dancing across the floor by himself, and thought oh okay, he is still here. Then a few minutes later, Cara came running up to me. She was like, “Oh my God, I looked over and Chad was seriously all over some girl.” I was like, what the hell? I figured she was looking at the wrong person thinking it was Chad because she had just met him for the first time last night. I got up to get where I could see, and sure enough, there he is dancing on some girl. Honestly I wanted to start crying because I was upset of course, but I also was in shock that he would be doing that right in front of me. I really couldn’t believe what was happening. I could only look for about 30 seconds and that was all I could take, but Brooke and Cara who were standing right there could see the whole thing. They said he wasn’t just dancing normally with her, it was serious dirty dancing. I really didn’t want to hear that. Well I have things I gotta go do, so BYE!

Commentary: Oh how I miss going to Stone Country. It was basically a bar with a huge dance floor that you didn’t have to be 21 to get into. I’m definitely not a fan of country music or any kind of line dancing, but they played country/pop music early on in the night, then completely switched over to rap around midnight. This made for a very interesting group of people – ones who liked country, ones who liked rap (me), and old creepy men who sat at tables and watched the young girls dance. There’s not a lot to do when you grow up in a small town, so going to “Stone” was always a fun time and I was able to create many great memories. Today’s photo is of a book of matches from my scrapbook that I apparently wanted to treasure forever.