11/15/01:  Yesterday was our nine month anniversary.  On Tuesday I decided to not call Jordan.  I usually call him every night since his stepdad put a block on the phone and he can’t call long distance.  I really was becoming way too dependent on him.  Like when I got home from school, I felt like I just HAD to call him.  I wanted to see if I could handle going one night without calling him, or in other words, going a whole day without talking to him since we go to different schools.  It was a very hard thing to do.  Every minute I kept thinking that there was something I had to do, and I didn’t feel right until I got to talk to him.  Jordan said that he was freaking out since I never called and went running in his neighborhood because he didn’t know what else to do.  He was kind of mad that I never called, but I really don’t want to get too attached to him.  He came over last night, and we curled up together and just chilled for about two hours.  It was great.  I actually shed a few tears, because I started thinking about how much I love him.  Yay!  Tomorrow is Friday.  I have to babysit for some family I have never even met, and they live kind of far away.  Ugh.  Anyway, I need to study for my U.S. history test that I have to take second hour tomorrow, so I’ll talk to ya later.

Commentary:  I didn’t want to get too attached to my boyfriend, but then had him over to cuddle and ended up shedding a few tears because I loved him so much.  Yeah, not attached at all!